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Do you say it’s my way or the highway

Have you ever been talking to a friend, coworker or lover and felt like you weren’t getting through? No matter how you rephrase and repackage what you are trying to say, they just can’t seem to grasp it. It’s not that your point is complicated or difficult. It’s just that—for whatever reason—the conversation is simply not working.

Maybe they’re from a different planet. Heck, maybe you are, and you don’t even know it. Maybe men really are from Mars and women from Venus. Maybe it’s simply a case of the blues. Or, perhaps, neither of you are morning people.

Regardless, the question remains: what do you do when you are speaking to someone about something that is very important, and they just are not getting it. It’s not clicking. They might even agree with you, and then repeat back what you’re trying to say in a completely wrong way (and thus, not truly agree or get it).

Is it your way, or the highway? Do you put your foot down, cross your arms, and announce proclamations about how the world works? Or do you try to find that special ground where you are free to agree or disagree? Or, do you insist on your point, but try—again and again, if necessary—to reach your friend, co-worker or lover. Perhaps a different turn of phrase will help. Maybe a different metaphor help them see what you’re saying. Or maybe more information? Or perhaps a sense of humor to lighten the mood and maybe, just maybe, lift the curtains of a dark stage and flood the idea with light.

Regardless, the one thing you don’t want to do is throw your hands up in despair and say “Never mind!”

Life is simply too short, and ideas are simply too important, to avoid difficult nut-cracking and conversation sawing. The best way to build friendships and long-standing relationships that are truly constructive is to invite others to see ideas from different vantage points. After all, isn’t this part of what you love in others: When they help you see a truth in a new light? None of us need to say “it’s my way or the highway”.

Sherri Rosen & Tyler Blanski, Sherri Rosen Publicity, NYC

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This entry was posted on Sunday, August 7th, 2011 at 12:28 pm and is filed under Clients, Friends and Colleagues. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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