Phone: (917) 699-1284

What is passive aggressive behavior? by Sherri Rosen

The definition I found from Wikipedia was this: Passive-aggressive behavior can manifest itself as learned helplessness, procrastination, hostility masquerading as jokes, stubbornness, resentment, sullenness, or deliberate/repeated failure to accomplish requested tasks for which one is (often explicitly) responsible.

So, my question to you is: are you the recipient or the perp?

Years ago, when I was a people pleaser I knew I was passive aggressive. I truly wanted to get angry at someone or many, but was too fearful of being honest with my emotions, because I grew up to please. So I would smile, take the whatever was being said to me, and then act out in a way to frustrate the other person. Example: This person was giving me his/her truth about how I was treating her. Instead of me being honest and direct back, I brought up a point from the past that would totally frustrate them. That behavior sucked on my part and I believe left both of us frustrated. And nothing was ever resolved.

I don’t believe anyone in my family ever spoke the truth. Can’t even remember one person, ever. I had family speaking to one another with sarcasm in their jokes, probably hiding an enormous amount of anger that they so wanted to express. And, it would have been a breath of fresh air if they did. Have you ever noticed the difference between when you are passive aggressive and when you actually take the risk and speak your truth. After the truth is spoken, your body goes into complete relaxation. Maybe not right away, because it’s such a new action for you, but later on there is a lightness to your body of not having to hide.

Many times I make a decision with certain folks that I want to deal with even though they are passive aggressive. Why? Because I either love them or they are talented in their work and I want to work with them. Is it easy? No, it’s frustrating as hell and can be exhausting. But there is compassion. Mainly because I have been there. I know how much courage it takes to be honest, direct and say what you mean.

Redhead's Rap, NYC  Sherri Rosen Publicity Intl, NYC

Redhead’s Rap, NYC
Sherri Rosen Publicity Intl, NYC

Bookmark and Share

Tags: , , ,

This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 2nd, 2013 at 12:40 pm and is filed under Clients, Friends and Colleagues. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

Leave a Reply




  • Google Plus Link
  • Twitter Link